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Ah sweet Paradise, she is a fair maiden!
Yes, God is dead and Christ is dust. Things change. I thought I'd show everyone why I called my site Tal's Paradise. This is a pic of my sweat maiden, whom I call "Paradise." Here she is wearing a masque. Maybe sometime we will perform an orgy for you on the Cam. But I don't know if I'm up to it. I want to keep "Paradise" all for myself. I know, I'm selfish.
I took this pic of "Paradise" over in England. Yes, she has another name. Perhaps someone might recognize her. But this does not matter. I just wanted everyone to know that I have my "Paradise" and you can find your "Paradise" too.
Of course I'm not going to share her with you. I'm a selfish bastard. Besides, that would be hard to do as she isn't with me now. I'm living off of memories. This is hard to explain. Besides, you would never understand unless you loved someone with all your heart, mind and soul and then suddenly they were gone.
But I do have my "Paradise," she is always with me. When I'm feeling down and lonely I think about "Paradise" and our great love. I know I must be blessed to have known such a love. This is also why I still have faith in love. Some people never know a love so great that it restores their faith in all of humanity. Even though I believe God is dead, I know there is "Paradise" and that keeps me towering.
Sometimes I use phrases that have special meaning to me, as they relate to poems I've written about the women I've loved. This is the case with the "towering" phrase. I must keep towering because I know there is more love I am to experience, more women who need my love and affection. This may seem egotistical, but it is not meant that way. I merely mean to say that I haven't lost faith in love or in humanity. That means if you are looking for love, maybe you have found it, or could find it, through me.
Of course this does not apply to everyone. Everyone can not be my "Paradise," and I certainly can not be everyone else's "Paradise." But if something clicks inside your heart and mind and says, "Yes, I've found my Paradise," then maybe we can form a bond of trust and build upon it a great love.
If not nothing is lost for the sun always rises and sets. There is always another day, other opportunities. Perhaps "Paradise" can not last forever. We must go through both happy and sad times it seems to be able to appreciate love when it comes along.
If I seem not to be making much sense, this is just because you are not me and do not know my life experience. Even though I've written extensively of my relationships, I have been selfish and hidden the best of "Paradise" just for myself. But perhaps over time I will tell you why I love her so. Then maybe you can see into my heart and come to understand me better. Maybe we will even be able to love.
Did you know you can come to love someone you have never met in person? True, this is possible. Love is of the mind, it is a mental experience, a trip we can all take if we just give in to the experience. It is like taking someone's hand and walking along. When you take someone's had you begin to walk not as two separate souls, but as one along the same path. That is what love is, trusting someone enough to walk along for a while in their company, experiencing everything together, sharing thoughts, feelings and all that may come as you go along together.
I have been many places with "Paradise." Some of the things we have done might shock others. Even the simple joy of laying in each other's arms on the white beach sand and watching the sunset, then hiding in the sand dunes through twilight into the night as we made love with the stars twinkling above, might shock some who have never done this. Yes, we ran naked down to the Gulf and swam as the waves rushed over our wet bodies, then rolled in the surf like two spawning fish before we ran up and hid in the dunes wondering were we dropped our clothes ... finding them finally but not really giving a damn about if we did or not. It is shared experiences as these which I keep to myself, and even when they are mentioned there is so much more which goes unmentioned, as how do you describe a love which is mostly feelings so intense that words are but playing blocks for what the heart knows is real?
True, I love "Paradise!" She is a marvelous woman. But we can't be together right now. Maybe one of these days. One never knows what the future may bring. Surely one of these days it will bring death to us all. But the "Paradise" I desire is here and now for I don't believe any of that crap about life after death. If you haven't found your very own special Paradise here on earth then you will never find it. So that is what I wish for everyone and why I called my site "Paradise." She is someone waiting for you, and each and everyone can find their own "Paradise."
Perhaps I will see you in "Paradise" then. When we die our bodies rot and decay leaving nothing of the flesh. The Egyptians knew this which is why they mummified their bodies, preserving them with what amounts to a mixture of salt and baking soda. I might like to be mummified myself. But I think to be embedded in clear plastic, naked for all the world to see would be better. In fact I see a future where this is a quite common form of internment. Only people stand their plasticized cubes in great Halls of the Dead for public viewing. There is no shame in such naked display of the dead. Of course it might not be so good for the environment if many people joined the Church of the Eternalists, as they call themselves. But I think I'd prefer it next to cremation at sea as was the proper way to send Viking Kings to Valhalla. Certainly I don't want to be put into the ground inside a hermetically sealed coffin. But I wouldn't mind the sharks eating me or perhaps a grizzly bear, thought certainly not alive! No doubt what will probably be my demise is for the worms to have a feast of me. Return to nature that is our fate. After life is only what we leave behind in the form of our creations!
Certainly "Paradise" is on Earth, not after life. If you ever knew a love such as I have known, if you ever felt so totally in love as I have felt in the embrace of "Paradise," then you would believe what I say. But most people who read this will pass it by with doubt and disbelief. But maybe there will be one who is special, who is different from all the rest. She and I will one day know our Paradise too! In time there will be others ... will you be the one to join me in "Paradise?" I wonder?